The Observer

Pots of syrup, drown this person already!

2009-05-07T22:12:00.000-07:00

Hurrah, well done, gift sent, surprise, message, received, happiness, acknowledgement, end.

She made this really nice card for him. He supposes it took her quite a while. Why would she take time to make this? He does not want to question that, he knows. ;)

Amazing envelope of gift, rustic, minimalistic, suppressive, sweet, lovely, thoughtfulness.

Took a hint that the book is great, bought it, wrapped it up like a tropical eskimo and sent it packing for the new owner.

Elation, you better reside here!

Overwhelming, really, you do not know how overwhelming this is!

2009-05-07T22:07:00.000-07:00

So like I was saying about instable hormonal dynamics, incorrigible colleagues, erratic behaviours of superiours, schedule uncertainties, and untimely inspections, this person sees himself in a metaphysical state of balance.

Past successes now translate to present predicaments, things like that, translations, or transgressions, rather, are really shaping themselves up to form a certain structural balance.

He can't be happier.

Oh, just a bit more!

2009-05-07T22:02:00.000-07:00

Robert Oppenheimer once said, 'The genius sees the solution before the problem.'. So this guy was looking at me and asked me what I was trying to tell him.

You know, I do not want to scrutinise into the words of Oppenheimer's statement, but can a solution be an ignorance as well?

It is an amazing subterfuge, and I believe it is the only way to survive in that Gulag camp.

Not planned, not crossed, not done.

2009-05-07T21:59:00.000-07:00

This time I really outdo myself again, following nothing but the whims of my very hormonal dynamics. Professor Nash, I know you must be really disappointed in me for not attaining your equilibrium. Things are, however, looking up and I do not want to screw things up.

You're mine, I'm yours.

2008-07-16T07:31:00.000-07:00

Once again another misconception surfaced and I was finally disillusioned yesterday night. Durian buffet at Goodwood Park Hotel. Ladies and gentlemen, this entry will describe a very effective method of torture I survived from.

Venue: Goodwood Park Hotel, Coffee Lounge
Price: Flea market cheap
Grubs: C4 paste

Very nice, really. DLSR still images, attractive font and mellow colour scheme. Really deceptive, I must say.

Okay, I have to say, every piece of work there is fabulous, like a gastronomical bomb waiting for battle. Once you have one in your mouth everything explodes, you feel like you're on food war. Virtually every part of your body battles with your mouth. Every inch of you wants to comment negatively on the durian lovelies, but your mouth resists. A true case of capitalistic mouth fighting a communist body.

Now this baby here bites. The puff head and butt are great. They will prance around once you have them in your mouth. Durian paste is evil which bites the tongue and teeth. Totally threatening. Run when you see this.

Devious mix of explosives. The middle sponge disc is madness. I had a hard time concentrating on a beautiful lady sitting in front of me when I was eating this. No comments on the pancakes.

Score: /

One bite of each is enough. Whatever you do, do not under any circumstances, eat more than you can handle. If you feel like vomitting, you may have taken too much of them. Our Chinese torture ancestors are probably interested in this method of torturing.

Company

Fernandez Bustamante

Chiam See Tong

When Venus loses the Sun's gravitional influence...

2008-07-09T07:51:00.000-07:00

Hi people. Once again I have another person to patronise. This person is very interesting. She loves to laugh at chocolates, go spastic, and call people names. Well, it is only polite to consider her as a potential date, but she is denying my kindness so fervently, I just had to convince myself that she truly lost her marbles.

Brief introduction
Name: Yvonne Moka née Ang
Age: 610,675,200 seconds
Height: 3 gnomes tall
Weight: When the both of us are on the scales, I will always be taller than her
Interests: Tennis, Talking to trees, Eating pongpong fruits

I have to say, she is pretty fascinating to watch, like a person watching a movie he does not prefer (forced by circumstances and asked for it by himself). Especially when she is out with the relief team. I observe reactions from some males. Some dropped their drinks and got their crotches wet (others did not actually have to use the drinks), some salivating (WHEN YOU CAN SALIVATE A RIVER, SALIVATE A RIVER, I SALIVATE A RIVER OVER YOU - SALIVATE A RIVER BY JULIE LONDON), some totalled their cars, practically every gamma male reaction has been observed. I just cannot understand why people react like that in front of her.

Anyway, I heard she bought a new blue car. A very unique car, I must say. From her words, I picture that it is small, has 4 wheels, catches wind and is comfortable. First thing that came to my mind, this:

I assume this photo is taken in her backyard. Totally astounding! The lush greenery and the pristine sand bunks, rabbits, earthworms, acidic soil and rafflesia flowers. Only a big place can house such a fantabulous backyard.

One trait I find her attractive is her passion for tennis. The way she holds her racket reminds me of a couch potato holding her TV remote who is deprived of TV for 2 hours out in the hot sun. She probably loves tennis so much her imagination treaded the idea of anthromorphising tennis balls.

WHAMBAM SUMMER TENNIS with Yvonne

Yvonne has a knack for arts as well. She composed a national anthem for the Republic of India, but a lot of Indian citizens were really offended by it. The composition was finally scrapped by the incumbent prime minister, Manmohan Singh. Those interested can listen to the composition here. She probably thought the prime minister was this:

Remember, attraction is not a choice. Search your emotions, marshie. Do not wait till I change my mind. Something like this might happen.

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You upset about this post? Don't be, you'll look like my bolster, lots of salivation from a guy, but still full of creases. See you in school, potrocks! ;-)

Neology Part 1

2008-07-05T09:23:00.000-07:00

Controllation: nounie noun To control.

Note: a nounie noun is a noun accentuated heavily by tranforming it further into a noun. A noun so nounish, it's sad seeing such a redundancy exists in life.
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Example of how to use it.

Fred: I have to urinate, nature's calling.

Sean: Asclep, there's no toilets here. You've got to control your controllations. We'll get there in time.

F: Yes I will. Just don't tempt me to uncontrollate my controllating controllations.

Guy on the phone: Oh! So it's central mall! Okay, I'll see you there.

F: You know, however good I am with directions, I still don't know how to get to central mall, so... Oh, look there's a guy that talking to his date on the phone! I'd bet all my controllation chips on this guy. I'm sure he'll take us there. Follow him!

S: Rubbish la. Act your age, Asclep. It's embarassing.

F: Sean, sometimes you've got to learn how to fly before you can walk.

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All hail the cake bride!

2008-05-29T09:17:00.000-07:00

Epitome of brilliance. I have nothing to say. Whoever did this is godsend, to me, to you, to the model, to the photography enthusiasts and to everyone. I am all absorbed, so leave me alone and in the meantime, enjoy what you are seeing. =)

Stirred Emotions

2008-05-06T06:21:00.000-07:00

Yvonne, ever since you crowned Dawina as my 'wife', I knew this will be most phenomenal moment of my life. Dawina, you're funny, weird, plethora of surprises and most importantly, you look great with your adorable cushioning. You crush ice, make fun of teachers and Yvonne Lee, talk to Charmaine about sex and argue with me. I enjoyed all of them.

Your loveliness discontinued my line of thought and I almost forgot about the central economic problem, scarcity. Men compete with each other for you, you are high in demand, and the price for your loveliness possesses an inelastically astronomical value.

I know it's daring for me to prognosticate a future for us. Allow me to lay it out for you, if you will.

We will probably have a child, Rosemarie Tay, who does not do well in studies because apparently, you cared too much on your research on the fusion of photonics and nanomaterials. Rosie is going to grow up a lady and she is not going to be decent. (I will have to further insulate my family from the tides of retrenchment and inflation, so I am not involved.)

Rosemarie Tay

I thought of the things we have to go through and that's right, gonads and strife.

So far, I tried a lot of ways trying to break this to you. I was literally struggling for an outlet. Once again, your grace inspired me, for you asked me to write an entry about you. It is a fantabulous idea, I must say. I have to stop seeing you, Dawina, for I am searching the coniferous in a vast dating forest. We would eat Cripps Pinks under a Red Delicious tree (deriding!), sing Irish hymns people laugh about, ride unicorns and trickle the saltwater in a smelly beach, but that is not going to happen.

SINCE I am dating someone else.

Her name is Ginny Chang, an orthodonist, and she will keep the kids' teeth white and clean. She will come home early in the late afternoon, cook plates of vegetarian spaghetti (no onions and garlic, of course), fix me a warm bath, and reprimand the children on their Uncle Tidbits expenditure, while I will wash the toilet when I bathe and look into the mirror to find answers for Life's greatest questions.

I am really sorry, Dawina. I miss you calling me Freddy Teddy, so, still friends?

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Disclaimer: All characters in the photos are residing in a harmonious and caring environment. Any resemblance to persons, fictional (legal) or factual, is quintessentially coincidental. And Daw, I am kidding. You know I am, right? =)

2008-05-01T17:15:00.000-07:00

News flash: The author of this blog clocked a new personal high for his typing speed, an amazing (subjective) 75 words per minutes!

Typing 101

2008-04-20T17:56:00.000-07:00

Tick, tack, clack!

I had always held much pride for my typing speed, still do. I know I type quick, but there had to have a quantitive measure for it. WPM, yes, that is the unit for typing speed.

History has it that the cuneiform script, earliest known form of written expression, was created by the Sumerians from ca 3000 BC. Later history suggests inventions of writing materials, paints, brushes, paper. When the world was beginning to civilise, writing become more prominent. Efficiency of writing was questioned. Improvements were called for. Thankfully, an English inventor, Henry Mill, driven by the winds of the Industrial Revolution, patented a typewriter. Further technological advances led to keyboards and computers, retaining the QWERTY configuration.

Indeed, the history of writing has come a long way, and typing has earned its place in this world, replacing writing. So it is definitely beneficial if I learn how to type well.

Thing is, I do not know how fast I type, and I have to type faster than anyone else. Fastest clocked is 73 WPM. I can be faster. Now I know some of you people will think I am chasing my own tail, but I have presented an argument why typing is important, right?

I have a few tips for typing fast. Here goes.

Go to Nepal and find a guru. He will teach you. Train in the mountains.

Burn your keyboard, pour the residue into water and drink it.

Osmose the chakra of the keyboard by sleeping on it like a pillow.

Dismantle your keyboard keys and eat them like chips.

Go to finger gyms.

Act like you are asking for assistance.

Dial your friend's phone number and hang up (good for numbers).

Soak two or three keyboards in a bathtub full of water for a week, then bathe in the bathtub.

Call police to help you type.

Cry to your mummy.

Tell your friends about your problems with the keyboard.

Hang out with friends who type fast.

Drum your fingers.

Plug in another keyboard to the CPU, that way your efficiency will be doubled.

Polish your keyboard.

Amateur pedagogy at its best

2008-04-19T21:57:00.000-07:00

Amidst the aloofness I hang on to go by the bad times, there are still traces of serious and hardcore stuff I want to express. Teaching allows that. For once in my life, I see my young self through these students. I would laugh at the thought of it!

Secondary school students go through puberty, that is when they will have to face further psychological trials, like mood swings and confusion. They lack a certain level of self-control and are curious with just about everything. It is difficult to keep up with them for the whole lesson. But that is really what students are, and they should really enjoy themselves whilst at this period.

People see them as noisy, boisterous, and at times, downright rowdy. All these misdeanours conspire to persuade people that these traits are linked to delinquents. Programmed response? Indifference, nonchalance, patronising. Yes, I cannot deny the fact that the students are like that, but I suppose I can still blame puberty for this.

I have got to see their strong points and encourage them to take the path that best protrudes their talents. Some are uncertain of their future, some are gung-ho about their hobbies. Indeed, educating a batch of students with a generic lesson is tricky. But I will try.

The misbehaving students are fun to be with. They are game for everything. Culprit? Curiosity. Personally, I think the loveliest way to express curiosity is to explore one. Ever watched Kids Say the Darnest Things? Yes, I am like the chinese Bill Cosby. I have my throaty laughs whenever I hear absurdities from my students. Plenty of students bombard me with that throughout the whole lesson. You cannot help but be amazed by their creativity, the triumph on their faces when I offer them my laughter. What is surprising is that if you offer them your laughter, they will be easier to handle. I suppose that is pretty much cause-and-effect in action.

The behaving students are fun to be with too. They exert more self-control and are easier to handle, not that I enjoy teaching them more than the misbehaving students. They do have stuff to offer too; life experiences, moral values taught by their parents. Pretty much the regimental and rigid moral structure that supposedly 'sustains' a safe society.

It is too early to judge them just yet, I have yet had enough fun in school.

RACHEL!

随感(二)

2007-11-20T05:56:00.000-08:00

最近、僕の方は、もっと分かることを加えていると思うね。大人なりか, 成熟なりか、僕は今わからない(皮肉そうみたいね)。でも、この情況を抱こうと思う。先、ホスピスへ父の方の伯父に御喋りしていった。彼の皺を寄せた手し、淡い黄色な目し、弱い体し、全部が僕のまえに融けあて成る絵に変えた。それでも、座った父の形は僕の注意を引いた。『20年、お父さんも彼に変えちゃって。』と考えた。その時、そんなことに僕が思い浮かんだ。父の命は易しくなかった、今までも。だからさあ、働けない僕は何をされるの？僕の稼げたお金で父と母も旅行に行く？家事を助ける？それで、両親の仕事を助ける？どうすればいいの？

Choices

2007-09-06T22:44:00.000-07:00

Well then, the future is bleak and I do not know where I am heading to. Three choices. Applied math, environmental engineering and economics. Which one should I choose? It is not like I appreciate ambivalence often. Pfft.

Applied math, favourite stuff, interesting course. Problem is, I am not an A level student and I do not have a very dainty secondary school math history.

Environmental engineering, lovely prospects, CHEMISTRY, engineering, math, madness stuff. Likewise, I am held back by my O levels credentials. The market is big out there, even here in Singapore.

Economics, bam stuff, fatal erudition, impressive credentials if succeed. Problem is, there is less math and more verbal and literal babble I have to deal with. So what is with economics? I am just plain interested. If I were an economics graduate, I will have to work for the chicken baba financial industry.

Enough said, chicken baba.

五月蝿い

2007-08-22T22:26:00.000-07:00

八月二十三日

シンガポルのデート事態とは？

友チェオンが『大変と思います。』という事は意見が一致しますよ。女たちが男たちに、金や知性や色々んな好い特色を探し、馬鹿にならない事は目茶苦茶にします。よく面倒臭いですよ！

もし誰の女たちかそんな続みている、一つだけをくれて。

『10年早いだぞう！』

てえめえらする事馬鹿みたい。止めてくれ。

今の想い出、中学と、小学と、誰かも愛で一緒に生きていません。全部で金の為、名の為、知性の為、ずっと不味いです。

チェオンと僕も流行を気がついた。中学ので可愛くて奇麗な女が好きし、理工学園で目茶苦茶な女が好きし、変でしょう？

チェオンはプログレッションを提案しました。ホラ！

顔 > 体 > 心

僕、以上のは一致にします。ご苦労な、チェオン。

特別な客、チェオンのイメール: cheong@the.com

随感

2007-08-22T09:12:00.000-07:00

三年ぐらい日本語習う事、毎年に考えていた時、誰か教えたり、練習したり。きりがないの想い出て来た。心出たのパッションがよく濡れた。アニメと習うも殆どない。悲しなかった。

でもさ、二週間の前に、平井賢の『Life Is.. 』を聞き直しました。歌の中に、次のぶんがあるんです。

『痛みを抱きしめる、それだけは真実。』

実はね、この文が意味たくさん。

運命の対決、誰かも戦いません。

果たして、自分だけ出来ます。

だから、文化学園へ行く事ブレンナンと、休みで。頑張ってしよう！

初めに

2007-08-22T08:38:00.000-07:00

名前はオブザーバです、これで僕のブログへようこそ、宜しく！

今日、何か感に書きている事のは、知りません。でも、別によ。さって、行きましょうか。